This was the phrase that most often entered my mind and came out of my mouth while watching Zach Snyder's Sucker Punch.
Sucker Punch mirrors an abstract painting from a 5 year old. Some kid flinging colors around hoping it sticks while someone tells them how amazing it is. But at the end of the day it has no rhyme, reason or anything that resembles coherence.
Now, don't get me wrong. I loved my experience seeing this movie. The first 5 minutes of the film are brilliant. The shot composition, the music, the stylized drama, all of it is beautiful. The movie starts so promising THEN the dialogue starts and it is all downhill from there.
The storyline and interweaving of the dreamworld and reality is one of the most confusing things I have ever witnessed. Zach Snyder describes 3 worlds in the film, the reality, sub-reality and the dream world. Confused? Yeah, it doesn't get much clearer in the film.
The action sequences are intense, enthralling and captivating. I measure an action film's success based on the amount of times I verbally want to say "Awesome" in a theater and I had this urge many times. However, unfortunately I had the urge to verbally say "What the hell is going on?" just as many times.
Sucker Punch is a giant mess. The characters have no depth, no motivation for their characteristics and the story has no heart. The plot (if you even want to call it that) is like a combination of Chicago, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, and One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest. However, those movies were good and this movie is terrible. All of those films succeed because A) a talented person wrote them B) We care about the characters and C) They weren't directed by Zach Snyder. Instead of mirroring these films in success, it turns out to be more something like Sisterhood of the 300 Traveling Pants. NOT a good result.
Another GIANT flaw in the film is the claim Snyder makes that the film is a Girl power, female empowerment flick. Let me ask you all a question... What is empowering about a film about 5 women dressed in school girl outfits with short skirts, low cut shirts and sucking on a lollipop? Dumb.
The best way I can sum up what Sucker Punch is this:
Have you even gone out and noticed a guy/girl who appeared extremely attractive, like a near 10/10? You start to imagine what it would be like to be able to look at this person everyday and be seen with this person and you start to think it could be great. Then you go up to them and try to start a conversation and nothing intelligent comes out of their mouth. You suddenly realize that maybe the beauty is nature's way of supplementing for this person's imperfections. Sucker Punch is this person. Something incredible to look at and the action is great but the moment it opens its mouth it is completely not worth it.
Nathan rating: 2 stars
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